jemima jones
by uniquechina
Summary: God, I wish I were thin.


**Hello everyone this is my first time so please tell me if I'm doing anything wrong so I could improve anything thanks**

This is my version of Jemima J. My life!

_Some people say that's its all about your up bringing the way you end up, some people say its just how god wanted you to be and some say well she was always a bit weird. Which of the three was it? Who knows?_

Finally works finished, which means I have the exact same thing planned that I do everyday after work I have a date, a date with Ronald McDonald and Cleo magazine.

I grab a big Mac and relax. I eat it so quick that I feel it's still stuck in my throat because there's just no more room, but I still put In my super size fries and coke, because I'm not a waster. Now its time to look at my magazine, no I don't read the "How to spice up your sex life"

Because I don't have one, or the

"How to be sure your mans faithful"

Because I don't have a man and if I did I wouldn't mind if he was, just to have one is lucky enough. I look at pictures and wish. I study every picture to find flaws. If I can't find them I cut them out and stick them in my draw and find what I best like about them, for example lips, eyes, body, and sex appeal, you know all that. But don't get me wrong I'm not some kind of lesbian or anything.

People ask all the time  
"if you could wish for anything what would it be?"

And then you get the usual replies

"Win the lottery, be rich"

If I could have anything I would have a perfect body, like Cindy Crawford's, but of corse I reply

"Win the lottery."

I have an appointment with my doctor at 3 but anyone who lives in Australia knows really that means four but just to be polite I turn up at half-past 3. I walk over to the receptionist because of the signs everywhere saying

"Please see reception on arrival"

And one would think as I'm standing in front of her that she would look up or even turn her head. No such luck. Normally I would yell

"Excuse me I'm waiting"

But they have those windows like at the banks to insure we get complete confidentiality. Well I wouldn't mind someone knowing I'm on the pill, but not for contraception, because my sex life has been non existent, for quite a while and that I got my tonsils taken out last year, if someone really wants to know why I'm at the doctors, what the hell! let them have a look if that means getting me in quicker. I tap on the windows and slowly she looks up at me as if I'm intruding then she puts a fake smile to show the $2.50 lipstick is actually all over her yellow teeth, Then finally finds it In her to say

"Take a seat."

Twenty minutes later I hear my name called

"Jemima Jones, repeat Jemima Jones."

I watch as everyone looks around and slowly rise from my seat. I enter and sit in the chair, when the lovely doctor looks and says

"Hello Jemima how can I help you?"

I tell her that I just want a check up so she does my height, blood pressure you know all of that kind of stuff and then she says

"All great so far I'll just get you to jump on the scales for me,"

Oh shit! Now what? is it too late to run? I haven't checked how much I've weighed since the 7th grade!

"Ok now nothing to worry about, just jump on there for me,"

I do, scared as all hell.

"Ok 107 just take a seat again for me,"

Take a seat? Why couldn't she ask that before she told me that, I feel like I'm going to faint!

"OK, your height, weight and age can be calculated to see how much your weight should be in comparison to your weight. I've done the calculations and your healthy body weight should be 65 which means that you are 42 kilos overweight, but apart from that all is fine, is there anything else I can help you with?"

I sat there for a few seconds and the only thing going through my mind was what a bitch! How dare she? I rose from my chair and walked out feeling a lot worse than when I walked in. If she was fat, she wouldn't say it like that.

In my state I knew I shouldn't be going home, so I went to my mothers which was yet another mistake I made that day.

"Mum, I'm home! Mum? Where are you?"

She sprung out of no where with one of her finest greetings,

"Oh Jemima," she says this disappointed, so I worried thinking my cat had died or something equally as awful had happened then she says

"What are you doing to yourself? Last time I seen you, there was only half of you, you've doubled!"

Always was a kind gentle person my mother.

"Mum, good to see you." I lied.

I knew she wasn't going to cheer me up, but her fresh apple pie was! So I headed for it then suddenly I heard screaming

"Jemima! No! You can't you need to be on a strict diet right now"

What could I say to this crazy woman? So I got up and left, and went straight to Safeway to get a two litre ice cream of triple-choc-chip.

I went inside collapsed on the lounge and grabbed a spoon knowing a bowl wouldn't be needed. I sat there thinking. Thinking why me, why couldn't I get a rich loving family, a perfect body with perfect skin and hair, why couldn't I have a perfect boyfriend or even husband? Why not? Who decides this why does it happen like this? After a lot of thinking how much I hate my body, and just want to be thin and beautiful, you would think I would go straight to the gym sign up and stop eating, but that just wasn't my style.


End file.
